How to avoid the perils of Halloween

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

By Jeet Rai

Some of us are just plain scared of Halloween. It’s not easy to dress up in a frightening costume and go out at the stroke of midnight to beg strangers for a candy or two. It’s even more difficult to be on watch duty when the pesky trick-or-treaters come around to do their fair share of begging. Perhaps it isn’t the act of giving the candy out that irks the average candy-giver, but more the prospect of standing face-to-face with an unrecognizable person behind a terrifying mask with blood and gore dripping everywhere.

People anticipate Halloween with horror because when trick-or-treaters are covered head to toe in costume, they don’t see a person; they see a character, or their worst nightmare come to life. Granted, some people absolutely love Halloween for this exact same reason. What’s more fun than scaring your friends by pretending to be someone else, right? (Wrong.)

This Halloween, we want to give a shout out to all the scaredycats of October 31 and offer some effective ways to avoid the treacherous holiday.

Pretend no one is home. Turn off all your lights, and do not, under any circumstances, put up Halloween decorations. Also, it helps to be the house at the end of the street. After a row of lit-up, welcoming houses with eager candy-givers, your house won’t look so appealing. The trick-or-treaters head the other direction, and you remain content and unbothered. Win-win situation for all parties involved.

Candy buckets. Set a bucket of candy outside of your house and no one will bother you. Promise. And then when it runs out (because let’s face it, it will), just sneakily go back outside when no one is around and replace the bucket. Everyone remains none the wiser.

Celebrate your own holiday instead. For all my anti-Halloweeners out there, what better way to avoid Halloween than to create an alternative day that celebrates something you enjoy? Gather your fellow scaredycats and pig out on cheeseburgers and sodas. Sit back and catch up on some classic novels or watch some comedic movies. Brush up on your Clue skills or play Jenga with your friends. Blast music so that you won’t be able to hear the boisterous knocking of the trick-or-treaters.

Follow any of these three alternatives and, for the subsequent years to come, October 31 will be just another day.

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